(ok, ok... actually just lying there)
BILL ERWIN (12/29/10)
Actor. Age 96.
Sid Fields is off to green fields.
TEENA MARIE (12/26/10)
Singer. Age 54.
She claimed to be a black singer inside a white body. We're not certain of that, but she's clearly a white body inside a dark coffin.
STEVE LANDESBERG (12/20/10)
Actor. Age 74.
Among other things, he played Dietrich on Barney Miller. Interestingly, DIEtrcih was typically described as DEADpan.
CAPTAIN BEEFHEART (12/17/10)
Musician. Age 69.
With a name like Beefheart, it's amazing it was multiple sclerosis that got him and not heart disease.
BOB FELLER (12/15/10)
Basaeball Great. Age 92.
The Heater from Van Meter is now significantly colder.
BLAKE EDWARDS (12/15/10)
Director, Producer, and Writer. Age 88.
Not such a good month to be named Edwards.
ELIZABETH EDWARDS (12/7/10)
Way jilted wife. Age 61.
When your husband is telling his side squeeze that, after his wife is dead, he'll marry her in a rooftop ceremony in New York with an appearance by the Dave Matthews Band, what's left really?
DON MEREDETH (12/5/10)
Footbal Player, Announcer, and Actor. Age 72.
How this guy never punched Howard Cosell in the face, we'll never know.
LESLIE NIELSEN (11/28/10)
Actor. Age 84.
Surely you're not breathing any longer?
"Glug, gurgle, gasp, ...and don't call me Shirley" Thud.
DINO DE LAURENTIIS (11/10/10)
Film Producer. Age 91.
The Dead Zone.
JILL CLAYBURGH (11/5/10)
Actress. Age 66.
An Unmarried Woman. An unbreathing woman too.
SPARKY ANDERSON (11/4/10)
Baseball Player/Manager. Age 76.
Sparky was the first manager to win the World Series in both leagues. Yeah, we realy didn't care all that much either.
BOB GUCCIONE (10/20/10)
Founder of Penthouse. Age 79.
Good riddance! If it weren't for you, Bob, we wouldn't have to shave our palms so frequently.
TOM BOSLEY (10/19/10)
Actor. Age 83.
Mr. C(emetery).
BARBARA BILLINGSLEY (10/16/10)
Actress. Age 94.
Even after repeated urging from her estate planner to leave her life savings to her step-children, Barbara still decided to leave it to Beaver.
NORMAN WISDOM (10/4/10)
Actor and Comedian. Age 95.
During his service in WWII, this fella was actually disciplined for calling Winston Churchill "Winnie" to his face. Now that's funny!
GREG GERALDO (9/29/10)
Comedian. Age 44.
Smart guy. Young son. Funny. Anyone not getting why drugs are bad yet?
TONY CURTIS (9/29/10)
Actor. Age 85.
Try getting out of this one Houdini.
GLORIA STUART (9/26/10)
Actress. Age 100.
We guess the first 100 years were just the tip of the iceberg.
EDDIE FISHER (9/22/10)
Singer, Entertainer. Age 82.
Arrivederci, Roma.
ROBERT SCHIMMEL (9/3/10)
Comedian. Age 60.
Have you heard the one about the comedian who beats a heart attack and cancer, finds out he has cirrhosis brought on by Hepatitis C from a past blood tranfusion, and then dies from injuries sustained in a car accident?
EDWIN NEWMAN (8/13/10)
Punny Newscaster. Age 91.
Responding to an inquiry regarding how he felt after a bout with pneumonia, Edwin said, "I feel like a new man."
DAN ROSTENKOWSKI (8/11/10)
Congressman Involed in House Post Office Scandal. Age 82.
Imagine that, a corrupt politician from Chicago.
PATRICIA NEAL (8/8/10)
Actress. Age 84.
The Day The Earth Stood Still...for Patty.
MITCH MILLER (7/31/10)
Musician, Conductor, Producer, and A&R Man. Age 99.
Gasp along with Mitch.
DANIEL SCHORR (7/23/10)
Journalist. Age 93.
If you counted Richard Nixon among your enemies and Frank Zappa among your friends, ya musta been a decent fella there Danny.
GEORGE STEINBRENNER (7/13/10)
Yankees Owner. Age 80.
The Moss.
BOB SHEPPARD (7/11/10)
The Voice of God. Age 99.
"Your attention please, ladies and gentlemen... I am dead."
ROBERT BYRD (6/28/10)
Seantor, Klansman. Age 92.
This Byrd has flown.
JOHN WOODEN (6/4/10)
Basketball Coach. Age 99.
John Wooden. Very.
RUE MCCLANAHAN (6/3/10)
Actress. Age 76.
Moldin' Girl.
DOROTHY DEBORBA (6/2/10)
Childhood Actress. Age 85.
Chubby: If love is like a rose, I will nip my rose in the bud.
Dorothy: If love is like a rose, I will stick my nose in the mud.
The Guys: Actually, your nose and all in the dirt, Dorothy.
DENNIS HOPPER (5/29/10)
Actor. Age 74.
"This is the way the f**king world ends. Look at this f**king sh*t we're in man. Not with a bang, but with a whimper."
GARY COLEMAN (5/28/10)
Actor. Age 42.
Well the world don't move to the beat of just one drum...and Gary, well, he just don't move.
ART LINKLETTER (5/26/10)
Singer. Age 97.
Kids say the darndest things; like, "He has no pulse."
RONNIE JAMES DIO (5/16/10)
Singer. Age 67.
Apparently arsenic, beryllium, cadmium, and hexavalent chromium aren't the only heavy metals which can cause cancer.
LENA HORNE (5/9/10)
Singer, actress, dancer. Age 92.
Considering the five lists she's on this year, that blacklist ain't looking so bad.
LYNN REDGRAVE (5/2/10)
Actress. Age 67.
Hey there, Georgy Girl. Why do all the boys just pass you by? Could it be you're dead?
DIXIE CARTER (4/10/10)
Actress. Age 70.
Supining woman.
MEINHARDT RAABE (4/9/10)
Actor. Age 94.
As coroner, you must aver
The death of me, a tiny sir
And I'm not only merely dead
I'm really, most sincerely dead!
JOHN FORSYTHE (4/1/10)
Actor. Age 92.
Hello Angels.
JUNE HAVOC (3/28/10)
Actress. Age 97.
Red, Hot, and (very, very) Blue.
ROBERT CULP (3/24/10)
Actor. Age 79.
Robert pulp.
FESS PARKER (3/18/10)
Actor. Age 85.
Down in old Fort Worth he became alive
After war and college, acted to survive
Disney plus 'coon cap made his career thrive
Stopped him a heart when he was eighty-five.
Fess E., Fess E. Parker, hit in the pool this year.
PETER GRAVES (3/14/10)
Actor. Age 83.
If you thought the mission was impossible before...
MERLIN OLSEN (3/11/10)
Football Player, Actor. Age 69.
Little box in the prairie.
COREY HAIM (3/10/10)
Actor. Age 38.
Yet another poster boy for childhood acting.
ALEXANDER HAIG (2/20/10)
General, politician. Age 85.
From "I am in control here" to "I am in a hole here."
LIONEL JEFFRIES (2/19/10)
Actor. Age 83.
From Grandpa Potts to Grandpa's Plot.
KATHRYN GRAYSON (2/18/10)
Actress, Singer. Age 88.
Kathryn Graysoon.
DICK FRANCIS (2/14/10)
Author and former jockey. Age 89.
How sad, not only small but flaccid as well (and on Valentine's Day to boot).
JOHN MURTHA (2/8/10)
Politician. Age 77.
Perhaps a Military Hospital wasn't the best place for John to seek treatment.
FRANCES REID (2/3/10)
Actress. Age 95.
Day of your death.
J.D. SALINGER (1/27/10)
Author. Age 91.
"Goddam money. It always ends up making you blue as hell."
ZELDA RUBINSTEIN (1/27/10)
Actress. Age 76.
The Legend of Zelda comes to an abrupt conclusion. The continue feature has been disabled.
CHEMICAL ALI HASSAN ABD AL-MAJID AL-TIKRITI (1/25/10)
Iraqi nasty-ass. Age 68.
Although his hanging was a welcome event, it doesn't count in the O.B.E. because he was executed.
PERNELL ROBERTS (1/24/10)
Actor. Age 81.
Trapper gone.
TEDDY PENDERGRASS (1/13/10)
R&B singer/songwriter. Age 59.
If you don't know him by now, chances are you won't be getting to anytime soon.
MIEP GIES (1/11/10)
Harbored Anne Frank & later found her diary. Age 100.
We're warning you in advance, hold your nose for this one....
When we asked Ms. Gies to be frank, this wasn't what we were expecting.