THE STATS

For those of you sick enough to want to know how many Death Watchers picked certain would be worm food, this page is for you. The Guys at the O.B.E. have slaved and toiled with compass, slide rule and abacus to come up with these numbers. So, with little further fanfare, here they friggin' are:

76 players entered the 2002 Old Blue Eyes Memorial Celebrity Death Watch. 331 different celebrities were picked to buy the farm by the end of 2002. However, 3 picks (George Harrison, Harvey Martin and Dick Schaap) across 6 lists bought the farm before the new year. This required that 6 lists have their alternates exercised. Of the alternates exercised, 2 alternates (Pat Kennedy-Lawford and George Bush Sr.) were not on any other lists, thus adding them to the count. For you math challenged kids, thats 331-3+2=330. Yup, 330 celebrities sit waiting to reap the rewards of this year's O.B.E. Memorial Celebrity Death Watch. Alright, alright, they don't get any rewards, but there is something about a Reaper.

Of the 330 celebrities picked to kick, 205 (62.1%) were on only one list (the Tad Szulcs), 41 (12.4%) were on only two lists (the double whammies), and the remaining 84 (25.5%) were on three or more lists. The number one pick this year was our very old friend BOB HOPE. Good 'ol BOB appears on 56 (17.0%) lists . Coming up next in line is STROM THURMOND. STROM appears on a whopping 43 (13.0%) lists. You may remeber our third most frequent pick, RONALD REAGAN, but he certainly doesn't remember you. RON appears on 37 (11.2%) lists.

As for the rest of the potential dirt nappers... Well, the complete breakdown of celebrities, who the hell some of these no-names are, and how many players picked 'em is presented below for your viewing pleasure.


The Celebrity

Why are they Celebrities?

How Many
Picked 'Em?

Bob Hope
Enough with the Memories Already
56
Strom Thurmond
Political Figure - Needs to RETIRE
43
Ronald Reagan
Ex-Lucid-President
37
The Queen Mother
Old English Ain't Just Malt Liquor
35
Pope John Paul II
Guy with Funny Hat
29
Katherine Hepburn
Actress - Kate at Heaven's gate
28
Milton Berle
Big Comedian - and we Mean BIG
27
Osama Bin Laden
Nasty Ass
24
Dudley Moore
Arthur Just Coughs and Wheezes
22
Buddy Ebsen
Actor Clamp-It shut
20
John Gotti Sr.
Very Nice Fella
20
Fay Wray
Actress - Grey Wray
15
Billy Wilder
Director
11
Madame Chiang Kai-Shek
Wife of Politician
11
Boris Yeltsin
Russian Lush
10
Ted Williams
Old Baseball Player
10
Hume Cronyn
Actor
9
Yasser Arafat
PLO Leader
9
Harry Morgan
Wife Beater
8
Johnny Oates
Manager of Texas Rangers
8
Kirk Douglas
Actor
8
Mickey Rooney
Short Actor
8
Marlon Brando
Fat Actor/Bad Parent
7
Rodney Dangerfield
Comedian
7
Bob Hayes
Former Olympian and Dallas Cowboy
6
Don Knotts
Andy's Main Squeeze
6
Eddie Albert
Actor - Green Pastures
6
Joey Bishop
Last Rat Packer
6
Johnny Cash
Singer/Jailbird
6
Julia Child
Chef Cholesterol Bomb
6
Leni Riefenstahl
Nazi Film Chick
6
Muhammad Ali
Boxer
6
Alistair Cooke
Guy in Leather Chair
5
Augusto Pinochet
Nasty Fella from Chile
5
Former President Suharto
Political Leader
5
Jerry Lewis
Dean's Ex-Partner
5
Max Schmeling
German Boxer
5
Richard Pryor
Comedian - Caught on Fire
5
Ronnie Biggs
Great Train Robber
5
Abe Vigoda
Actor - Fish
4
Art Carney
Actor, Barney Rubble Prototype
4
Arthur C. Clarke
Author
4
Carrie Hamilton
Carol Burnett's Daughter
4
Dick Cheney
Politician
4
Edward Teller
Father of H-Bomb
4
Elizabeth Taylor
Wacky Actress
4
Estee Lauder
Cosmetics Billionaire
4
Fidel Castro
Made Convertable Bed?
4
John Kenneth Galbraith
Economist/Author
4
King Fahad
King of Saudi Arabia
4
Lester Maddox
Georgia Politician
4
Princess Margaret
Princess
4
Red Auerbach
Former Celtics' Coach
4
Roone Arledge
ABC Sports Personality
4
Rosa Parks
Something About a Bus
4
Sarah Brady
Gun Control Advocate
4
Simon Wiesenthal
Nazi hunter
4
Stephen Hawking
Smart Guy
4
Tom Laughlin
Actor and Film Maker
4
Andy Griffith
Matlock et al.
3
Annette Funicello
Peanut Buttery Actress
3
Antonio Todde
Shepard - Oldest Living Man (2002)
3
David Brinkley
Wrinkly Announcer
3
Freddy Fender
Singer
3
Gerald Ford
Bumbling President
3
Henri Cartier-Bresson
Photographer
3
Hugo Banzer
Former President of Bolivia
3
J.D. Salinger
A Catcher in the Rye
3
Jack Buck
Sports Annoucer
3
Jack Klugman
Actor Pull the Plug-man
3
Jesse Helms
Politiician
3
Johnny Carson
Tonight Show host
3
Keith Richards
Rock & Roll Pharmacist
3
Lady Bird Johnson
Lydon's squeeze
3
Liza Minnelli
Friend of Sinatra
3
Prince Rainier
Prince of Monaco
3
Robert Downey Jr.
Smack fiend
3
Robert Earl Jones
James' Dad
3
Saddam Hussein
Nasty Ass
3
Sir John Mills
Actor
3
Skeeter Davis
Singer
3
Suzanne Somers
Hottie
3
Ted "Double Duty" Radcliffe
Baseball Player
3
Whitney Houston
Looney gal
3
Benny Carter
Jazz Musician
2
Billy Graham
Evangelist
2
Bob Denver
Little Buddy
2
Brian Wilson
Beach Boy
2
Charles Lane
Actor
2
Claude Levi-Strauss
Anthropologist
2
Dick Van Dyke
Actor/Comedian
2
Ed McMahon
Johnny's Lap Dog
2
Eddie Van Halen
Man, He Got Valerie
2
Eddy Arnold
Country Singer
2
Estelle Getty
Actress Getty up and Go!
2
Fred Rogers
Mr. Rogers
2
George Beverly Shea
Gospel Singer
2
Gregory Peck
Actor
2
Holly Johnson
Singer - Frankie Goes to Hollywood
2
Horatio Sanz
Fat Comic
2
Hunter S. Thompson
Fear and Loathing Author
2
James Doohan
Actor
2
Jim Nabors
Gomer Pyle
2
John Goodman
Fat Actor
2
Jonathan Harris
Danger, Warning, Doctor Smith
2
Karl Malden
Actor - Big Nose, Big Smell
2
Larry Kramer
AIDS Activist
2
Lionel Hampton
Jazz Pioneer
2
Louie Anderson
We Think He Ate Andy Kaufman
2
Michael DeBakey
Heart Surgeon
2
Olivia de Havilland
Actress
2
Phyllis Diller
Comedian
2
Princess Anne
A Royal Pain in the….
2
Ray Bradbury
Author
2
Ron Santo
Former Chicago Cub
2
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
Judge
2
Saul Bellow
Author
2
Scott Weiland
Stoned Temple Pilot
2
Sean "Puffy" Combs
Rapper, Producer
2
Studs Terkel
Chicago Columnist
2
Tim Conway
Comedian
2
Tom Christerson
Implanted Heart Recpient
2
William Westmoreland
General, Vietnam
2
Willie Nelson
Singer
2
Woody Allen
Director/Writer/Dick
2
Abdurrahman Wahid
Indonesian President
1
Adam West
Actor - Batman
1
Aidan Quinn
Actor
1
Al Hirschfeld
Characiture Artisit
1
Al Lopez
Baseball Player/Manager
1
Al Sharpton
Racist
1
Alain Delon
French Actor
1
Alexey II
Patriarch of Russian Orthodox Church
1
Alice Ghostley
Actress
1
Alija Izetbegovic
Former President of Bosnia
1
Andy Rooney
Annoying 60 Minutes Guy
1
Art Buchwald
Writer
1
Arthur Miller
Playwright
1
Artie Shaw
Musician
1
Astrid Lindgren
Wrote Pippi Longstocking
1
Atal Behari Vajpayee
Prime Minister of India
1
B. B. King
Musician
1
Bill Gates
Ya Know
1
Billie Bird
Actress
1
Bob Barker
Game Show Fur Activist
1
Bob Davies
Australian Footballer
1
Bob Dole
Politician
1
Bob Feller
Baseball Hall of Famer
1
Brooke Astor
Philanthropist and Socialite
1
Carol Channing
Weird Looking Actress
1
Carol Shields
Author
1
Chaim Potok
Author - The Chosen
1
Charles Bronson
Actor
1
Charles Durning
Actor
1
Charlie Daniels
Country Singer
1
Christopher Lee
Actor
1
Christopher Reeve
Superman of the Disabled
1
Chuck Jones
Cartoonist
1
Clark Terry
Jazz Trumpeter
1
Dale Messick
Created Brenda Starr
1
Dan Devine
Former Notre Dame Coach
1
Daniel Shore
Commentator on NPR
1
Danny Bonaduce
Radio Personality/Former Partridge
1
Darryl Strawberry
Baseball Player
1
David Beckman
English Soccer Star
1
Dennis Rodman
Basketball Player
1
Denny McLain
Former Baseball Player
1
Dick Van Patten
Eight is Enough Dad
1
Dom Deluise
Fat Comedian
1
Donald Sutherland
Actor
1
Doris Day
Actress
1
Dorothy Rodham
Hil's Mom
1
Earl Scrugg
Banjo Player
1
Elie Wiesel
Heads Holocaust Memorial Foundation
1
Elizabeth Kubler Ross
Author on Death and Dying
1
Eminem
White Rapper
1
Ernest Gallo
Wine Maker
1
Ernst Mayer
Zoologist
1
Eunice Kennedy-Shriver
Old Kennedy
1
Evel Knievel
Daredevil
1
Frances Reid
Actress in Days of Our Lives
1
Gene Wilder
Willy Wonka
1
George Bush Sr.
Ex-President-Read Blue Lips
1
George Christian
Press Secretary for LBJ
1
George McGovern
Politician
1
George W. Bush
President of US
1
George Wendt
Norm!
1
Geraldine Ferraro
Politician
1
Glenn Ford
Actor
1
Gloria Stuart
Actress
1
Helen Gurley-Brown
Wild Broad
1
Hugh Hefner
Matt's Idol
1
Hugh O'Brian
Actor
1
Jack Kevorkian
Dr. Dead
1
Jack Paar
First Tonight Show Host
1
James Caan
Actor
1
James Coburn
Actor
1
Jane Withers
Actress
1
Janez Drnovsek
Prime Minister of Slovenia
1
Jay Berwanger
Won First Heisman Trophy
1
Jean Belliveau
Hockey Player
1
Jean Stapleton
Actress
1
Jennifer Lopez
Uh, Her Ass Dude
1
Joaquin Balaguer
Former President of Dominican Republic
1
Joe Barbera
Cartoon Fella
1
Joe Franklin
TV Interview Show Host
1
Joe Paterno
Penn State Football Coach
1
Joe Piscopo
Comedian?
1
John "Zackerley" Zacherle
Horror Show Host
1
John Thaw
British Actor
1
John Walker Lindh
Traitor
1
John Wooden
Basketball Player
1
Juan Antonio Samaranch
Presiddent Olympc Committee 1980-2001
1
Judy Bell
Golfer - First Female President of USGA
1
Kerry Packer
Australian Media Mogul
1
King Norodom Sihanouk
Cambodian King
1
L.J. Foret
Cajun Musician
1
Larry Doby
First Black in American League
1
Larry Hagman
JR Did Shots
1
Laurence S. Rockefeller
Rich Guy
1
Lawrence Tierney
Actor
1
Lee Starr
Ringo's Daughter
1
Leo Ornstein
Composer
1
Leona Helmsley
Bitch
1
Leonard Nimoy
Spock
1
Les Paul
Guitar Guy
1
Lew Burdette
Former Baseball Pitcher
1
Llyod Bensten
Politician
1
Lou Duva
Boxing Promoter
1
Louis Farrakahn
Racist
1
Lucia dos Santos
Fatima Visionary
1
Luciano Pavarotti
Tenor
1
Luise Rainer
Actress
1
Machauly Culkin
Kid Actor, Has Been
1
Magic Johnson
Well, at Very Least a Busy Johnson
1
Maharishi Mahesh Yogi
Funny Little Man
1
Margaret Thatcher
Former Prime Minister of Great Britain
1
Mariah Carey
Pop Diva
1
Marion "Suge" Knight
Rapper
1
Mary Higgins Clark
Author
1
Mate Parlov
Olympic and World Champion Boxer
1
Mattie Stepanek
11 Year Old Author
1
Maud Farris-Luse
Worlds Oldest Person (2002)
1
Maximilian Schell
Actor
1
Meinhardt Raabe
Muchkin (not Dunkin')
1
Mel Brooks
Comedian/Actor
1
Michael J. Fox
Actor
1
Michael Kinsley
Writer, Editorialist
1
Mick Jagger
The Stones
1
Mickey Spillane
Mike Hammer guy
1
Mohammad Zahir Shah
Former Afghan king
1
Monte Irvin
Baseball Hall of Famer
1
Morgan Freeman
Actor
1
Mr. Wizard (Don Herbert)
TV Science Guy
1
Mullah Omar Mohamad
Bastard
1
Naguib Mahfouz
Egyptian Author and Nobel Laureate
1
Nell Carter
Gimmie a Big Fat Break
1
Nelson Mandela
Fella in Dashiki
1
O. J. Simpson
Murderer
1
Omar Bongo
President of Gabon
1
Oral Roberts
Preacher
1
Pat Kennedy Lawford
A Hybrid
1
Patrick Leahy
Senator
1
Patrick McGoohan
Actor
1
Paul Harvey
Radio Guy
1
Paul Pena
Tuvan Throat Singer
1
Peggy Lee
Singer
1
Penny Singleton
Actress
1
Pervez Musharraf
Ask George W. Bush (Pakistaini Leader)
1
Peter Rodino
Politician
1
Phil Donahue
Talk Show Host
1
Pope Shenouda III
Pope of Coptic Church
1
Prince Leka
Crown Prince of Albania
1
Prince Mikasa
Japanese Prince, Emperor's brother
1
Prince William
Little Punk
1
Princess Juliana
Queen of Netherlands
1
Racquel Welch
Former Bombshell
1
Ray Charles
Musician
1
Raymond Firth
Anthropologist
1
Rich Little
Impressionist
1
Richard Attenborough
Actor
1
Richard Butler
Aryan Nation Dude - Racist
1
Richard Simmons
Strange Little Man
1
Robert Clary
LeBeau From Hogan's Heros
1
Robert Whitehead
Broadway Producer
1
Roger Devenport
Race Horse Owner and Breeder
1
Roger Moore
Actor
1
Ron Jeremy
Porn Guy
1
Rose Marie
Actress/Comedian
1
Rubin "The Hurricane" Carter
'Cause of the Movie
1
Ruth Westheimer
Sex Gal
1
Sam Snead
Old Time Golfer
1
Sandra Dee
Wholsome Actress
1
Sherwood Schwartz
Producer
1
Shirley MacLaine
Loopy
1
Shirley Temple Black
Child Actress
1
Sid Caesar
Comedian
1
Sidney Sheldon
Author
1
Sis Daley
Wife of Richard J. and Mom of Richard M.
1
Smokey Robinson
Vocalist
1
Soupy Sales
Bad Comedian
1
Stan Musial
Baseball Player, Stan-the-Man
1
Stanley Rosenfeld
Photographs Yachts
1
Sting
Former Member of the Police
1
Stone Cold Steve Austin
Wrestler
1
Stu Hart
Wrestler
1
Ted Kennedy
Old Drunk from Unlucky Family
1
Terry Jones
Member of Monty Python
1
Thurl Ravenscroft
Tony the Tiger's Voice
1
Tony Randall
Actor
1
Tony Stewart
Race Car Driver
1
Turhan Bey
Star of Mummy Movies
1
Vaclav Havel
Political Leader
1
Vasja Smislov
Former Chess Champion
1
Vincent Sherman
Director
1
W. Clement Stone
Insurance Magnate
1
Walter Cronkite
News Guy
1
Warren Spahn
Baseball Hall of Famer
1
Wavy Gravy
Hippie
1
Wellington Mara
Owns the New York Giants
1
William F. Buckley Jr.
Writer, Commentator
1
William Proxmire
Politician
1
Wilma Mankiller
Chief of Cherokee Nation
1
Winona Ryder
Actress
1
Wolfgang Wagner
Director of Bayreuth Festival
1
Woody Harrelson
Actor - Hemp Guy
1
Yasmine Bleeth
Baywatch Life Guard
1
Yogi Berra
Boo Boo's Pal
1
Yoko Ono
Leach
1
Zsa Zsa Gabor
Actress
1


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